Skin Care Routine

     I'm going to go through a list of all the products I use to wash my face. I don't think any of it really helps that much, but it makes me feel refreshed and proactive every morning and night ✨ Plus, I just haven't written on here in a while because of school and homework. However, since it's already a little over halfway through the Spring semester, I've found some time to blog again :) enjoy

    My credentials on rating facial products: 

• I've struggled with acne and scarring on my face since I was in middle school
• Used to see a dermatologist who would recommend me different topical creams
• After a while I was put on Accutane because nothing else was working 😍
• Broke out the worst I had ever broken out before (the purging) and my face was painful to the touch
• My acne only ever nearly went away completely when my diet consisted of Monster energy drinks and saltine crackers, so I assume it's pretty diet/hormone related, but what do I know honestly?

side note: LOVE the brazilian bum bum cream in this picture by Sol De Janeiro!

1. Aruba Aloe

I use this AM and PM as my first step before I do anything else to my face. I first started using it during my trip to Aruba last year in November. I believe it helped keep my acne at bay while simultaneously lathering facial sunscreen at the beach. 8/10

2. Laneige - Cream Skin Toner

I use this AM and PM as my second step. This felt really good when I first started using it, but overtime I wonder if it's worth it or if it's just another useless step in my routine. Either way, I still apply it because it does help with dry skin. 6/10

3. Murad - Acne Treatment Serum

I use this AM and PM as my third step. Murad was recommended to me by my boyfriend's mom in November/December of last year as well. I used to use their cleanser too, but it was adding onto my time at the kitchen sink and I don't think it made much of a difference on my skin anyways. I do like this serum though, and I just restocked it last night. 7/10

4. Laneige - Water Bank Cream Moisturizer

I use this AM and PM as my fourth step. I just found out last night while I was at Sephora that this specific moisturizer is for dry skin, and they have two other ones for oily skin and for combination skin. I myself have combination skin, so I've technically been using the wrong moisturizer. However, I will say that despite this, the one that I have is great at keeping my skin from flaking. I definitely don't need to use a lot of it, just a little bit will do. I can tell the difference during the day when I don't put this on, and my face feels too tight. 8/10

5. Laneige - Hydro UV Defense EX (SPF 50+)

I use this every AM as my fifth step. Before buying this one, I was using Neutrogena's "Clear Face" sunscreen serum, which had antioxidant green tea, and was SPF 60. I'm just going to say this: I'm not sure if I love the Laneige one better than the Neutrogena one. Alright? I don't know. I tried comparing the list of ingredients in both sunscreens, and Laneige's seemed to have less/better ingredients, but again, I'm no sunscreen specialist, so I don't know. I feel like once I run out of this bottle I'm using now, I'm going to go straight back to Neutrogena's because it's 1) cheaper, 2) higher SPF, and 3) I feel like it wasn't as heavy on my face.... But yeah, I don't know. 4/10

6. Murad - Rapid Relief Acne Spot Treatment

I use this every AM, PM, and throughout the day as needed. You just put a little bit on where you have blemishes that you want to help heal. I'll usually pair this with an acne patch after, or just let it breathe. 6/10

7. Laneige - Cica Sleeping Mask

I use this every PM as my final step. The summary of this mask (from Laneige's website) states that it's, "A soothing Korean sleeping mask to visibly calm sensitive skin and strengthen the skin's moisture barrier overnight." They also instruct to use it one to two times per week- meanwhile, I've been using it essentially every night since getting it 😄 So yeah. What can I say, I want to see the results ASAP. I assume it's safe to use every night. No bad reactions to it or anything! Can I say if it's helped with calming my skin and strengthening the skin's moisture barrier though? Hmmmm. No on the first one, but yes on the second one. 5/10

8. Laneige (I know, again, who's shocked!?) - Berry Lip Sleeping Mask

I use this every PM as my final, final step. I got this for free last year at Sephora for my birthday. It was part of a box of mini-sized Laneige products, which included the toner and moisturizer as well (hence why I now use so much from their brand). I like the sleeping mask, and I feel as though it does work. I can tell it stays on overnight. 8/10

Honorable Mention:

Lush - Tea Tree Water Toner (only use this as a replacement for the Laneige toner if my acne is REALLY bad)

    I never really got into "skincare routines" after getting off of Accutane. I think mostly because I was scared it wasn't going to work, or worse, make my skin breakout even more. Throughout my early teenage days up until now, my face has always been my biggest insecurity. The thing I was always conscious about, even on days where it wasn't that bad. So, what's changed? 

    Honestly, nothing. 

    My face is still my biggest insecurity, and I don't think that will ever go away. Having clear, perfect skin will likely be unattainable. It's just been something I've grieved over and over again for far too long. "You're acne will go away once you use this", "It'll stop showing up after Accutane, it's the strongest product out there", "You're in your twenties, your acne is sure to be gone for good soon!" These sayings all sound nice, but they've kept me in a perpetual grievance for most of my life, waiting and hoping for something to change- and then when it doesn't, waiting and hoping again, just to be left feeling destroyed on the other end. It hasn't stopped yet, and perhaps it never will. 

    I guess what I'm trying to say is, although nothing about my insecurity has changed for me, I can do one thing to help myself: Try to stop worrying about it as much as I used to. Sounds easier said than done, but honestly, I do feel like growing up has helped a lot with caring about the way I look. Middle school and high school were rough days for someone struggling with cystic acne. Being in an environment where it felt like everyone was constantly getting judged, it makes sense that now I am finally able to look past other people's perceptions of me (six years later). 

    If you have acne too, don't beat yourself up for it like I have. "Those who mind don't matter and those who matter won't mind." 

Peace and love ya'll <3

- Koiz